The Wing General has had
a tough two weeks in regard to his wing research
correlations with IU basketball. As the editor has noted on the Wing
General page, there was some "funny" stuff going on which both
affected the
wing research and IU basketball. The Wing General was dutifully conducting
his research at Kilroy's when someone with a North Carolina jersey bolted
through the door and ran straight back to the kitchen. Within five minutes,
this mysterious person ran out the front door bellowing out an evil laugh.
Within moments, the Wing General's order of wings was delivered to his
table. He sensed something was awry, but quickly dismissed that thought as
the game was about to start. As he bit into his first wing, he noticed a
faint, yet pungent taste began to envelop his taste buds. It was a
thick,"tar heel" taste that was absolutely disgusting. Within minutes,
the
Wing General's taste buds were unable to decipher any taste from any food
item. It was if his taste buds were numbed by the inexplicable foreign
substance. The Wing General then noticed that as this was happening, the
Hoosiers began to play very poorly. It got worse as time went on. The Wing
General's research had been sabotaged!!! Who could have done such a
dastardly thing?? The Wing General thought he heard the mystery man mutter
the words " Reed...Scaf..id..ho" as he exited the building.
As you can imagine, the Wing General was not happy about this. His wing
research is serious business, and no one was going to "taint" his
findings.
He did have to cancel his research at BW3 in Indianapolis.
It took several days to recover from this hideous act, but the Wing General
was ready to try again. The next research session occurred just before the
IU - Pepperdine game at a place called "Grumpy Ed's" in Greenwood,
Indiana
which is just south of Indianapolis. The Wing General was waiting patiently
for his plate of "Big Red Fire" wings to arrive. About five minutes
before
tipoff, there was a scuffle at the door. It was very crowded and the Wing
General could not see what was happening, but a cold chill went up his
spine. Within a few moments, things calmed down, and the plate of "Big Red
Fire" wings were delivered to his table. The game was beginning and the
Wing General did not bother to view his plate before sinking his teeth into
the first wing. Immediately, he knew something was wrong. The heat was
extremely intense, and then more commotion began to erupt at the paging
microphone stand. All of a sudden, a voice came over the loudspeaker. The
Wing General recognized it almost instantaneously...it was the voice of the
mystery man that had sabotaged his research earlier that week in
Bloomington. As the Wing General felt his taste buds go numb, the voice
bellowed out its evil laugh and said..."Wing General, why do you think they
call it Pepper...dine..? The voice then said "Your research is foiled
again...long live the Heels." The mystery man's laugh became more intense
and he then muttered "Reed...Sca..fid..ho" and bolted from the
restaurant.
The Wing General saw both his research and the Hoosiers fade into blandness.
It was rumored that the Hoosiers had ordered wings for their pre game meal
from this establishment, and it must have been sabotaged as well. The
delivery person left a note with the order. All it said was "Reed...Sca..fi..do".
The Wing General vowed to get to the bottom of who was behind these
dastardly deeds and will hopefully reveal the identity of these wimps in the
next update. Stay tuned as the Wing General's research will now enter
advanced stages on the correlation of wing consumption and bowling,
specifically relating to lane surface conditions. This research could could
bring bowling to a new level of excitement for everyone concerned!!
The
Wing General